fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
The adults are the big ones right?
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