Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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