If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
