So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Will exercising make me less horny?
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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