First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
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