Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Randomize
