Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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