Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
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