similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
Randomize
