"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
These Are The 21 Strangest Sexual Fantasy Confessions
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.