This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
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