So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
We need a shit load of segways right now
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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