Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
