I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
i was born a porn star she said
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
Randomize
