literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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