Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Even the bartender felt bad for me
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
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