So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize