dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
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