At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
