That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize
