I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Randomize
