The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
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