You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
We are two peas in an std pod
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Randomize
