"it" just moved
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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