Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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