just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
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