Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
well you can't waste a boner
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
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