Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
Just puked most of my soul out..
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
