Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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