lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
