Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
