You don't have asthma, your pregnant
i barfeds in our rink
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
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