did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
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