i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Randomize
