we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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