Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize
