sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
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