I am in a vortex of obligation.
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
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