You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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