Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
Randomize
