I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
