Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
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