a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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