If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
