I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Randomize
