come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
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