This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
