yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
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every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
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