I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
Randomize
