wrigley field is MILF paradise
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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