He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
Randomize