Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
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So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
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I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?