Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(949): View more from California

Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old

(503): View more from Oregon

You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.

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(770): View more from Georgia

she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.

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(651): View more from Minnesota

nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.

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(612): View more from Minnesota

and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling

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Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(757): View more from Virginia

I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well

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(206): View more from Washington

That's why there are breakfast margaritas.

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(306): View more from Saskatchewan

But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances

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(402): View more from Nebraska

He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.

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(708): View more from Illinois

No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that

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