There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
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